Cafe Beyond

Dear Bed, Bath & Beyond:

Last night I had three pork tacos at Café Beyond, the food establishment located inside, and presumably affiliated with, the Bed, Bath & Beyond at 620 Sixth Avenue. If you're familiar with Merriam-Webster's dictionary, you might recognize the preceding: it's the definition of "bad decision."

But I'm not writing this e-mail to complain about the quality of food at Café Beyond. Diarrhea-inducing food is as much a natural part of a department store cafe as snobby salespeople are a part of Kim's Video, or ineptitude a part of Time-Warner Cable. Furthermore, I had eaten at Café Beyond before, so I knew what I was getting into. The mistake was on my part for not heeding the age-old adage that you should never get Mexican food from the same place you buy your throw pillows.

Instead, I'd like to take this opportunity to give you a few suggestions for improving Café Beyond without losing your natural right—nay, obligation—to be kinda gross:

1. place a clean, easily accessible bathroom directly next to the café;


2. offer Immodium AD to customers upon request;


3. remove the Blue Cheese Burrito from your menu; and


4. upon the realization of my first suggestion, change the name of the food establishment from "Café Beyond" to "Café Bed, Bath, and Bathroom."

I firmly believe that, once these reforms are put into place, Café Beyond will truly be the cafe it was meant to be.

Best wishes for the holidays,

Chris W.

Real Rhapsody

Please fix Rhapsody. I don't know if you realize this, but since it's been updated, Rhapsody has kinda sucked. Not royally; just kinda. The search bar keeps disappearing when I click on a band. The pages sometimes go blank. Things take ages to load. Is there any rush to fix all this? Or are you all just sitting there patting your backs since the updated Rhapsody is "more or less" up and running? I haven't gotten any notification saying "You may experience some technical problems relating to Rhapsody's recent upgrade. We plan to fix these problems shortly. In the meantime, we appreciate your patience and welcome your comments." This is the least you can do.

Also, the check box below regarding e-mail filters makes no sense. The sentence next to it simply states that some e-mail filters prevent automated e-mail responses from reaching you; it doesn't explain why you should or shouldn't click the check box. What does clicking it mean? This should be fixed.

- Chris W.